It was over in a flash and suddenly she was in his arms. Fear had caused her breathing to become heavy, the adrenaline coursing through her veins, pupils dilated. frizzy tendrils of hair sticking to the nape of her neck due to her sweat. Was she human?. Her clothes were ripped, this was one of her favourite 'joras'. Was this wrong?. She could see the crimson stains blooming shyly over her body, once she'd wanted to be a doctor. To help. To be good. Why did she keep murmuring "I forgive you" ?. The reddened skin on her wrist was growing blue black. Blue black. Blue black. In the shape of manly fingers holding on too tight. Blue black.
Monday, March 17, 2014
Cosmic Inevitibility
Dark. Light. The tempest swirling inside her. The lightning cracking in the open sky,Its thunderous companion using the stray electricity to make an abstract portrait. Grubby hands, callused and rough raining blows down on her. Again and again. It never stopped. She never stopped. Never stopped being wrong, never stopped infuriating him. The wife she could never be. The daughter she would never see. The mother she never should have lost.
Wednesday, February 19, 2014
A Girl Made of Glass
There was a girl, with crooked teeth and eyes too big and writing on her body. She would have been completely normal and perfectly happy had she not been made of glass.
Her family was so proud when she was born. "Other people may prance about with flesh and blood but not my child! My child is something special I can feel it!" Her father exclaimed to anyone who would listen.
From far and wide and there and here did people come. Long and short, black and white of all kinds did people come.
To see the child with transparent flesh and glistening skin, clinking about with her large eyes and crooked teeth.
Oh how they applauded her!
Oh how she laughed!
But soon enough the laughter was no more and the wonderous echo of a booming clap had dissipated.
For the girl began to grow.
And her family soon realised that she was made of glass!
What an impossible thing!
What a pathetic thing!
Who would accept her?
People were cruel. She would live forever in endless exile. What were they to do?
For their darling girl, with eyes too big and crooked teeth.
And so they told her to stop being so transparent.
And they tried to shroud her. Like a dirty secret. They began to tell her how wrong she was. So great was their fear. A wrong that must be righted. A freak.
So the girl stopped smiling, and she stopped clinking, and she stopped thinking, and she stopped feeling.
Slowly becoming as breakable as the glass she was made of.
Years passed. She watched her sisters grow, as flesh and blood. She caught her fathers pride at Meg's good grades, and Cassie's good looks. Caught it in her fist like a hummingbird stuggling for release, but it was never to be hers. What was to be hers?
The hard unforgiving glint of distaste in his eyes when his gaze strayed to her?
The awkward shuffling of her friends when they saw her approaching?
The crevices scratched into her heart that no one noticed?
Slowly, oh so slowly she incased herself in iron. To hide the chips in her skin and the writing on her arms. All the words they never took the time to hear. Maybe they would read them on her arm one day and everything would get better. Sometimes she found nothing more tragic than hope.
She crawled into a corner and let herself be swept away by the written word.
Yes, books and parchment and ink not blue enough became her passion.
And her refuge. And her dirty secret. Reading about desperate sorrows she could not fathom.
There was a girl with crooked teeth, and eyes too large and writing on her body who was made of glass.
Who slipped away, escaping into paracostic whimsy.
Her sillage lingers in the breeze rushing through a windchime, in eyes that see things much too far and in thoughts that sometimes wander off the edge of the world.
A Public Disguise
I don't know which cloak to sweep on today.
I have already made you believe my goodness, my intelligence, my faith, my wealth. I wonder sometimes if there is a person left underneath the lies, i wouldn't know.
I haven't seen her in years.
If you see her, tell her I've stopped wondering.
Sunday, December 8, 2013
Sunday, December 1, 2013
Obsession.
Your scent clogs my throat
Intoxicating
Your hands leave fingerprints on my soul
Carelessly
Your mouth burns holes through my skin, to my heart
Unintentionally
But when your fading footsteps drum a beat on my wooden floors
Painfully
I finally understand
That the world smashes us into pieces
So someone can put them back together and break us again
Completely and Perfectly.
So that soon enough
Smiles are weighed down by the tears
Gazes are drowned by despair
Bodies are weatherbeaten into submission by Grief.
So that when your lips ghost over mine
I will always let you chain myself to you
Because being whole
Has become my obsession.
Saturday, November 30, 2013
Between the raindrops
I want to see you smile
Feel your twinkling gaze fixed on me
So when the crushing desolation
Of my selfish heart
Enraptures me
Confines me
I can remember
A fleeting splay of joy
Before this creature inside my chest
Decides it is too tired
And needs to rest
And my selfish heart stops pumping
And my traitorous body stops feeling
And my numbed mind stops grieving
And my depraved soul starts fading.
Shiny stars.
Maybe some people burn brighter than others
Maybe they're like the stars we watch, Shining from our windows in the night sky
Maybe sometimes
We put up our hands
And curl them in the open air
And pretend that we can actually touch them.
But the truth is
They will always feel alone in a crowd
They will always glance wistfull
At the people around them
Wishing they didn't burn. At all.
Because some people
Can't be fixed
Because some people
Are meant to be broken.
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